Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Stop me if you've heard this one...

I'm more or less just writing this in an attempt to shake off the rust and get funny again. If not funny, then not a colossal waste of time.

Today is February 22, 2011. We're about 60 games into the season, so why the hell am I having PTSD about last year's playoffs? Seriously, check it..

  • Wings playin' the Sharks
  • 4-3 Wings loss
  • Devin Setoguchi
  • Buncha fucked up refereeing
  • Todd McLellan getting jumped on by Mario as he goes to save the Princess
But hey, the Wings won 5 straight before this one. And hey, Jim Jam made almost 40 saves. That's...well, that's subpar defense, but super cool goaltending. Joey MacDonald sucks.

The scoring gets started with 8 seconds left in the first when Joe Thornton whacks the puck in and everyone on Twitter was like "oh fuck" "this....jfc" "STANDARD" and I was like "lol" cuz I was in class and couldn't watch half the game. It's not stopping me from writing about it like I saw it though. If Fox News can do it, so can I. JOURNALISTIC INTEGRITY.

But then in the second, Dan Cleary was all like "What are y'at, boys? How's she goin', buddy?" and scores a goal, because he's from Newfoundland. Rocks of Merasheen.

But then later, the OTHER Newfoundland b'y, Ryane Clowe, scores a goal. But that sucked, and we don't want his maggoty fish. They're no good for supper. So then good ol' Danny Cleary comes in 'n scores anudder. God bless yar cotton socks, Danny, me ol' cock. 'e's the b'y that shoots the puck and 'e's the b'y that scores.

Then everything goes some crooked and Floppy McGee Divin' Slip-o-...guchi scores two more and everyone's like "fuck", and then Zetterberg scores one on the powerplay, and that's it. Wings lose 4-3.

Sorry about all the Newfin'. I'm Newf at this. ....me b'y.

Oh, one last note: I'm back on the Twitter after a brief hiatus. You can find me at @emersojo. Follow me. Let's be friends...again.